Monday, April 26, 2010

Doing a new thing!!!!

Y'all are such an encouragement to me. Flat out need to tell ya that. What a blessing the blog community is.....regardless of how many people read, comment, or read and move on....this is where community is and I thank you for being such a huge blessing in my life.

Ok, let me just say that GOD IS HUGE. Well, duh, but He is.

I've got me a nice little past that pretty much involves anything you could think of....except for robbing a bank or something. And let me also say that none of this "past" occurs after I met my AMAZING man. This is a nice chunk of time between the ages of 14 and lets say 21 or 22.

Sometimes God allows events in our lives to be used later in life to bring His Name honor and glory. The Creator of the universe and the One Who saved my life multiple times always has a plan....HE FINALLY SAW FIT THE TIME AND PLACE TO USE THAT MESS OF A PAST OF MINE.

So, what is it?

I'm so excited and clapping my hands over it. Day one is over and never in all my life have I been more at peace over something.

I was given the opportunity to work with the West TN Coalition for anti-drug use and underage drinking.

What in the world is that you ask?

We bring education and awareness to our county in regards to underage drinking and drug use.


This makes my heart beat. This is a platform that fortunately, but unfortunately I know a smidget about.

He will take our messes, our disappointments, and our struggles and allow us to use them for some good in Jesus Name.

This is phenomenal y'all. This is all God. This makes me thrilled to have endured years of junk so that I can speak, plan, and develop an awareness for our community and make a difference in the lives of others.

You amaze me Lord. I can never thank you enough for saving me from myself.

Love you all. Thank you for celebrating this time of "full circle" with me!
Hugs and blessings~

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

"It" happened.

Ok, so let's see.

Where was I?

Oh was changing faster than fast after I arrived at the hospital.

I told you in part 1 that I don't really want to spend a lot of time on the details of that night because that's not my "it." But, I will share these snippets with you....The "it" is in the story.

Once Dr. M got taken to surgery and the reality of "it" all was hitting me, I saw some things so beautiful in the trauma of "it" all that I want to share.

I saw a mom tell her son in the middle of a packed ER with us all staring and crying...."God has a purpose for you. For YOU! Don't ever forget how much He loves you and He has a unique plan JUST FOR YOU!! Let's live every day in search of Him and that purpose. God's hand was on that gun and He protected you, your brother and your dad. Let's live on purpose FOR HIM!"

Wow. When have you told your kids something like that? And really meant it?

I saw a woman walk the road of terror and the unknown with complete confidence in Christ. When someone asked "what if he loses that leg she simply said....he has another one."

Oh, Lord....teach me to walk in that confidence and trust!!

I realized just how much I loved the people around me. That's what happens when you go through something big has a deeper meaning. I don't want to go back to loving the "other way."

I take the dogs out every night between 9 and 10, but something was different now. I remember looking up at the stars one night and tears filling my eyes. "It" happened. I saw God in a whole new way. He is massive and huge in all His creation, but He is tender and loving and present in every little thing we do.

I heard a man tell the story of that evening and what happened in a split second and how he realized that God saved his life. He shared details of conversations with his family members. He shared how he cried out to Jesus in the ambulance. He spoke of Jesus to anyone that was within his reach.

I want to have that type of confidence. I want to speak of Jesus to anyone within my reach. I also don't want to wait until something serious happens. I learned right then and there that it was time to get serious with living this life He has given me intentionally.

There are so many more things I could share, but I want you to think about this small list and see what you can do differently as you go through the motions of the day.

And, just so you know.....After a few days in ICU, moved to the in house rehab unit of the hospital, receiving countless units of blood, and dealing with the daily ups and downs of being in a traumatic, life-threatening situation.....this amazing Doc was given a 2 hour pass to head over to his clinic.

And...I was able to catch a glimpse of that beauty.

And, "it" was more than my heart could take.

God saved this man. Clearly he is a miracle. God also used "it" to change me completely and I'm begging Him to keep me this way and not let my humanness take over and slip back to the old way.

Have a beautiful rest of the week! Praying for you all!
Hugs and blessings~

Monday, April 19, 2010

"It" is happening.

The night was April 7th. It was Wednesday night and I was driving home from church and literally watching the storm roll in. The lightning was fierce and I knew I wanted to get my kids in and out of showers before "it" came.

The kids were settled in their rooms watching the end of American Idol when I got "it." A text message from a friend was asking about my boss (my boss and his family are also friends). I didn't know what she was asking me about so I simply called my boss and he didn't answer.

Nerves increased. This was not your typical "I can't get in touch with so and so" text. The context of this text message was like one I have never received. Within 2 minutes.....everything began to change. Everything is still changing. "It" changed me. I don't ever want to go back to the way I saw things before 7:45 on the evening of April 7th.

I know you are dying to know what "it" is. And, "it," is so complicated, but I'll do my best to share what happened. However, this story is not about the event of my boss and his family. We are looking past the story.

My boss is a doctor. I worked for him up until I told him about a job that landed in my lap and I resigned on Tuesday the 6th! Oh mercy that was a hard conversation. Anyhoo.....I promised to work my two weeks and we managed to get through Tuesday's day of work without me crying.
Y'all I love this place and I love the people in that place. We are family.

Wednesday was a beautiful day (insert Cary rolling her eyes at me) and we had a ball at the clinic. However, I look back now and see just how quickly life goes from being all good and fine and IS NOT GOOD AND FINE AND OK.

Oh, Jesus. You were right there with us all.

Ok, back to watching American Idol on Wednesday night. I'm in my pj's. I'm all comfy. I'm waiting to get in the bed and close my tired little eyes. And then the text message comes.

This is the "it." Apparently my doc and two of his oldest sons were involved in an accidental gun shooting at their home. They are huge gun people and can talk and breathe guns like I talk and breathe my husband and kids. They love it!!!!

But wait. Jesus, I'm scared to death.

I was shaking.

I cried.

The storm was the worst we have had all spring.

I remember thinking....."I'm getting in the car right this second. The heck with the storm."

I somehow changed clothes and drove in that mess of a storm to the hospital only to learn...

This was serious.

This was life threatening serious.

He had lost 4 units of blood. The gun went off 22 times in 2 seconds. He was struck multiple times.

Oh, Jesus. I'm so stinkin' scared.

I prayed in my heart over and over and over...

"Lord, please save this man. Please be with his wife. Protect those boys. Lord, they need their dad. She needs her husband. He's way too young. It can't be time."

God was definitely tending to the doc and his family that night. God was also tending to me that night too.

I just didn't know it.

"It" happened. And, I don't wanna go back.

There is so much to tell. Part 2 will be up tomorrow.

Monday, April 5, 2010

A beautiful moment to a 2 year old moment.....

Well, I have another church story to tell. Last week I was brave enough to tell you about my fake chewing. Feel free to scroll down and catch that masterpiece if you missed it. This week, I've got a sweet story to share and, unfortunately, a not-so-sweet story to share. I tell ya, Jesus loves me this I know, but man He has to be a little disappointed in my 2 steps forward, 3 steps back action I had going on. ;)

Let me explain.....

Somewhere last week I had read Ben's encouraging words to the church to use Easter week to scatter the seed of the gospel somewhere. Or at least that's my translation of what I heard him say. I read this on his blog or his facebook page and it stuck. You know why it stuck? Because I honestly have never invited a non-believer or non church going person to church on Easter. OUCH. And, let me clarify, inviting someone to church is not all that Ben was suggesting. I think he was simply reminding us to use Easter week to share the gospel with someone.

So, on Friday night, my 13 year old and I were on our way back home from picking up the dog at the groomer and we drove by this place where a lot of homeless men will sit and ask for money.
We were waiting on a red light and our car was placed in just the right spot to read his sign but not be right beside him. Since I can't see all that great far away, *ahem,* the boy read me his sign....

"Any thing will help.
God bless"

Ok, hmmmm.....I've seen signs and homeless people before, but God did something in my heart over this guy. HE WOULDN'T LET HIM GO.

We drove on past and I think I told the boy something like, "I wish I had some money to give him, but I don't even have a dollar in my wallet right now."

I got about a mile up the road and the Lord WOULD NOT LET THIS MAN GO FROM MY MIND. I mean it's Good Friday and all and Ben's words of scattering seed would not leave my heart. The boy kept saying stuff about the homeless guy that I wasn't really paying attention to because I was trying to figure out what to do with this. And, finally I just said it....

"We need to go home, find some cash, and a bible or devotional and take it back to him."

Well, this is clearly God, huh?

And, so we did.....we zipped home and did just that. We got our goods and were heading back to the spot where we found him sitting. I was getting so excited about sharing the gospel with this man. We had to position our car in just the right spot so the boy could roll his window down and share the money and the devotional with the man. But wait....we got to the spot....and....



NO, LORD!!!!

My brain was moving a million miles an hour and I knew exactly where to go. I drove right around the corner to a place where you might see other homeless men. And, low and behold.....


It was a much less busy spot and we were able to stop. The boy rolled his window down and gently placed the money inside the devotional that was marked for those struggling. The boy quickly grabbed a pen and wrote at the top of the page...."He died for YOU today." I about lost it at this point.

The boy handed him the stuff and said something like "Happy Easter...may God bless you." And, I'm about to LOSE IT!!! I honestly wanted to talk to him more, but he was saying things like "oh thank you, oh thank you....God bless you....oh thank you, oh thank you."

My heart melted.

We drove away. I wasn't ready to leave.

I said to the boy that I'm glad we did that for that man and it felt good to scatter the seed....I said something like..."because it's Good Friday and all."

The boy quickly said..."mom, it's always the right thing to matter what the day is."

My heart exploded with love and joy over that boy and my Jesus on that Good Friday.

Oh, yes....scattering the seed is gooooood.

Ok, real quick...I want to tell you about my most pouty moment on Saturday night at the Saturday night church service we attended for Easter. Shame on me, shame on me, I tell ya. I went from scattering the seed to acting like a bratty 2 year old.

The service was packed that night and we were clearly not early enough to get a seat in the sanctuary. And, honestly.....I had truly been looking forward to a really good word from Ben and having Travis lead you in worship isn't half bad either.


And, it's crowded and there is nowhere to sit. Boooooooo!!!

So, there are some usher people and some other pastors asking members to give up their seats and head over to the overflow room and they are telling my sweet family of five that we can go to the overflow room and I basically stomped my foot in front of another pastor/leader person and said......

"But, I don't wanna go to the overflow room!!!!!!!"


Good one Fran.

And, then I went on to say something about us being visitors......





Most definitely pouty.


Then, God showed me His humor and said, "well, here ya go Miss Pouty Pants."

The front row opened up and the same pastor/leader guy walked us down to the front row.

And, there I sat with an embarrassed heart before the Lord. I sat there for the first 10 minutes praying I would see that kind man after the service and apologize for being such a jerk.

And then the music started and my heart was overflowing. The message was beautiful. And, I never saw that pastor/leader guy again to say "I'm sorry."

I'm sending him an email today...found it on the church's website. God isn't letting this one go either.

Funny how we can go from a scattering of the seed moment to a pouty 2 year old moment when things aren't going our way, huh?

Happy Post-Easter!

I just love y'all.

I blog so you can get a glimpse into my life as wife, mom of 3 boys, and someone who simply wants to bless others along the way. Have fun and be sweet :)

Boy 1

Boy 1

Boy 2

Boy 2

Boy 3

Boy 3

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